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dream man

i have been asked this question a lot in my waking life, so i thought i would address it now:

i don’t know what my dream man would be like. i guess ideally, he would have the looks of zac efron, humor of john krasinski, artsiness of joseph gordon-levitt, musicianship (including guitar and vocal skills) of joe brooks, and generally just have our relationship based off of insult-based humor, mutual respect, trust and understanding and open and honest communication. i guess there’s my dream man in a nutshell.

also i guess i would like a man who cooks because i’m hopeless in the kitchen (sorta), someone who helps me watch my weight cause i’m a fatty and cooks me healthy food, someone who won’t massage me, someone who eases me into cuddling cause i hate that shit, someone who won’t call me cute, someone who pushes my beliefs and surprises me in every single way.

i guess my ex boyfriend was sorta like my dream man but now he’s gone and i don’t know where he is and i can’t just sit and wait here for him to come back. it’s not fair.